I had, what I would consider, an easy
and enjoyable pregnancy. Other than some
severe fatigue during the first two trimesters, some sore/numb feet towards the
end, and some hip pain when I slept, I had little complaints. I had relatively little morning sickness (and
never actually ‘got sick’), rarely had heartburn, and only peed on myself one
time when I sneezed too hard (which I found more humorous than annoying). Also, on a couple occasions, I laughed so
hard that the laughter turned to outright crying, which is a strange phenomenon
and was comical to my husband.
All-in-all though, I thoroughly enjoyed being pregnant and all that came
with it. I had never felt more at home
in my body or had such great body image.
I was *supposed* to have a big belly, so having one didn’t make me feel
insecure. I cherished my baby bump and
delighted in all it offered (people are so nice to you when you’re pregnant!).
36 Weeks at the Drive-In & I made it til 2am! |
38.5 Weeks working on Baby's quilt |
Everyone hears horror stories from
labor & delivery and I had heard my fair share as well. Before being pregnant, these stories always
lead me to be in the “give-me-the-epidural-as-soon-as-I-walk-in”
camp. Because, PAIN. But just the same, I wanted to be prepared to
deal with contractions in case they had to turn off my epidural (like one
friend I know) or if I got to the hospital too far into labor and they couldn’t
give me an epidural (like another story I’d heard). These stories coupled with a slight fear of
the epidural process (being confined to the bed
for hours with completely numb legs freaked me out a bit) led me to seek
some pain management alternatives. So,
when I found out that the hospital offered a Natural Birthing class, I talked a
reluctant Brandon into signing up for it…..just to be prepared. It was a series of three separate 2-hour
sessions, led by a registered nurse who worked for the hospital. Brandon was fairly skeptical of the natural
birth process. He questioned whether
natural labor was necessary (why not get the epidural if I can and enjoy the
process rather than endure it?) and he joked that it seemed slightly hippie to
consider it. But, because I wanted to
go, he obliged.
The class was a mix of lectures,
slides, and videos, and it also allowed time to practice the techniques. It had about 8 couples and met in a large,
open auditorium at the hospital with lots of floor space. This allowed us to spread out and try out the
different poses, stretches, and breathing skills we were learning to aid in
pain relief during labor. These
stretches and poses also really helped my pregnant body feel better too. Our instructor, Iniko, was great and we
learned so much! She was extremely
reassuring, encouraging, and helpful.
She made the class informative, enjoyable, and fun.
One hilarious moment came when Iniko
had us all lie down on floor mats and listen to a relaxation tape. After the lights were dimmed, the voice on
the tape guided us through how to completely relax our bodies, including imagining
different smells (yeah, we agree, it was kinda weird). It went something like this: “Breathe in the scent of orange as you focus
on relaxing your shoulders….”
Brandon and I had begun to giggle to ourselves about the goofiness of
the directive, so as the tape continued, so did our laughter. By the time we were to the point of relaxing
our hips, we were almost laughing uncontrollably at various scents that could
be released as we relaxed. And then the
tape said something like “Now imagine the
scent that is wafting through as you relax your rear end.” And that’s about where we completely lost
it. Okay, maybe the tape didn’t say
those exact words, but that’s how both Brandon and I heard it. Thankfully, all the couples were spread out
in the room, so I don’t think we interrupted anyone else’s relaxation, but
Brandon was laughing so hard that he was crying and he ended up leaving the
room to compose himself. I think my idea
of relaxing doesn’t include imagining different smells. But, to each his own.
In spite of the funny relaxation
tape, we both really liked the class and became believers in the process. The more we learned in our class, the more I
liked the idea of natural labor. I
started to feel empowered and confident and not afraid of pain. With potential benefits like a shorter labor,
the freedom to walk and move around during labor, less medical interventions
that could affect Baby, and faster recovery time, plus my anxiety about having
numb legs, Natural Childbirth seemed more and more like the way to go for
me. I was skeptical to tell others I was
feeling this way (I quickly found that people look at you like you’re crazy),
but deep down, I knew I wanted to try this process. I couldn’t even really explain it, I just
felt like my body was designed to grow and deliver a baby, so I wanted to let
it do its thing.
Oddly enough, when I found out I was
pregnant, I had not gone to a traditional Ob-Gyn Doctor for pre-natal care. Instead, I had chosen a midwife from the
start (not knowing that I would later really need her support in going
natural). Years prior, when I had moved
to Lex and chosen an Ob-Gyn, I discovered that I didn’t like her, even though
she was highly esteemed and recommended.
During my first yearly exam with her, she seemed cold, had an off-putting
bed-side manner and always seemed to set me on edge instead of provoking
calmness. To me, she seemed hurried,
annoyed, and way too young to have a lot of baby-delivering experience. At the time, Brandon and I weren’t starting a
family, but I still wanted to gain a good rapport with someone for when we
did. When that time came, I wanted to
feel comfortable with the person who would take care of me during pregnancy and
guide me through delivery.
Unfortunately, it just wasn’t this doctor. So, the next year when it was time for my
exam, I agreed to see whoever else in the practice was available, which turned
out to be a midwife.
To my delight, the midwife was a true
hidden gem. She is an older lady, not
old, but older than the doctor I didn’t like.
And her perfume smelled just enough like an old lady to be comforting (I
know, I’m weird). She spent a long time
with me answering questions and explaining to me the benefits of using a
midwife. I also found out that we
attended the same college (albeit several years apart) and so I just felt a
comradery with her over that (Go Racers!).
All-in-all, she just put me at ease with her calming presence and casual
reassurance. When I thought of a
midwife, I always thought of a home birth.
So, I was curious when I found that she worked in a hospital setting. I was never
one to consider a home birth (hats off to those that do, but I’d rather be at
the hospital for those “what-if” scenarios), but as my midwife explained her
role versus the role of a doctor during the labor and delivery process, I was
intrigued and interested. In addition to
the fact that midwives offer a more hands-on, focused experience, they also
really care about what you, as the patient, want during your labor and
delivery. They are patient to wait on
labor, not rushing medical interventions, and not as quick to push towards a
c-section unless really necessary. For
me, it was the perfect marriage between reaping the benefits of a midwife, but
having the assurance of the hospital’s protocols if there was any type of
emergency.
My last prenatal appointment ended up
being with the doctor I didn’t like because my midwife was out for a delivery. Brandon didn’t attend this appointment with
me (one of only 2 appointments he missed – he was at all the others because he
rocks as a husband and future dad!). The
appointment fell when I was one day shy of being 40 weeks pregnant. The doctor, likely unaware of my intentions
for a natural labor and desire for Baby to make his own arrival, seemed slightly
aggravated when I said ‘no’ to her offer to “strip my membranes” (a process
where she would go in and use her finger to gently separate the
bag of water from the side of the uterus near the cervix). Um, no thanks! I just didn’t see the point of trying to
*make* labor happen (but then again, I’m pretty stubborn). I wanted this guy to make his arrival when he
was good & ready. I had also heard
stories from other moms who’d had this done and regretted it. It caused bleeding, cramping for days, and
needless worry. So, I was happy with my
decision, even if the doctor wasn’t (just another reason I was glad I hadn’t
chosen her to be my prenatal doctor!).
July 3, 2014: My Due Date!
40 weeks in and Baby
Boy was showing no signs whatsoever of coming out. One of the only things I craved during my
pregnancy was Indian food from one particular restaurant, so we went there for
dinner that night. Not even spicy food
could get him moving.
July 4-6, 2016: Overdue
I was starting to get
round and massive – haha! I carried Baby
Boy pretty low and since I already have a pretty short waist, my belly just
didn’t have anywhere to go but out. Looking
back at this picture, it almost looks fake!
We attended a
fireworks show on the 4th at a nearby neighborhood. I will always fondly remember this night,
waddling up and down the sidewalk waiting for the show to start, knowing it
wouldn’t be much longer now til
we met our Baby Boy. The
fireworks were shot over a lake so the lights reflected and bounced around on
the water and it just added to the dreamy ambiance of eager anticipation that
filled our night. It was our last
holiday as a family of 2!
As the days ticked
by, I kept busy working on hobbies, taking naps, and watching Baby Boy kick my
belly (that has to be one of the most weird, but most awesome feelings in the
world!). Brandon and I even took in a
movie on July 6. We saw Captain America:
Winter Soldier. My mom told me later
that she saw a movie on the night before she went into labor with my brother.
The looks that people
give you when you tell them you are past due are a mix of shock and panic –
ha! Their eyes get wide, they look at
your belly, and you can almost see the fear in their eyes as they envision
horrifying things like your water breaking on their shoes.
July
7, 2014: False Labor
For several months I had been
experiencing “Braxton Hicks” contractions, these are smaller, sometimes not
even noticeable (to some women) practice-contractions. Thankfully, mine were never accompanied with
pain, but instead caused my belly to tighten up and labored my breathing just a
tad until they were over. So when I was
awoken around 4am with some crampy-type contractions I knew that they were
different! Then around 5am I experienced
some “bloody show” – a mix of blood and mucus which signals that this is the
real deal, not just Braxton Hicks! I got excited and scared all at the
same time and woke Brandon to tell him the news. I was able to get a bit more sleep and
started timing the contractions around 7:00am. They were coming every
10-15 minutes and lasted about 30 seconds.
We decided Brandon should go on into
work to tie up any loose ends and I'd let him know when to come back
home. The contractions got farther apart, coming every 10-25
minutes. And then, around 9:00am, they stopped altogether. I can't
say I wasn't disappointed, since I was now 4 days past my due date, but I
wasn't surprised either as early contractions can start and stop before they
really get going & stay going. Needless to say, Brandon worked all
day. Between 9:00am (the time they faded out) and 11:30pm (when I went to
bed), I had random, short, mild contractions. We wouldn't end up with a
7-7-14 Baby Boy, but at least now we knew he was finally making some movements
to entering the world in the near future.
July
8, 2014: Not False Labor
After about 3 hours of sleep, I was
awoken for the second night in a row with contractions (at about 2:30am), except,
these contractions were more than crampy-type ones, they were a bit
stronger. Still, they were only every 10-16 minutes and lasted about
25-60 seconds. I lost my mucus plug around 3:45am. But then around 5:30am, I had some bright red
bleeding with less mucus (which could signal an issue). So, we called the
after-hours line for my doctor's office and we were instructed to head to the
hospital to get checked out and make sure all was well. After checking
Baby, we were assured that everything was ok, but they wanted to admit me just
the same for monitoring, even though I was only 2cm (but thinned out) and
wasn't in active labor yet.
So, at 6:15am, I was admitted, gowned,
and ready to roll! It was earlier than I
had wanted to arrive at the hospital, as I was hoping to have labored in the
comfort of my own home until I was closer to active labor, but I was glad to
know that Baby Boy was okay. Brandon and
I got a chuckle out of seeing the hospital paperwork after the fact. It listed my “Chief Complaint” as
Pregnancy. I’d say the contractions were
a bigger complaint, but I won’t split hairs as one leads to the other.
My partner in crime and in labor was
there beside me. We were all studied and practiced up on our natural
labor techniques and now it was game time!
At 7:00am, we had our first
shift-change. Our new nurse, Terri, was
big on natural labor and was excited that I had chosen that route. She was awesome and even snuck in some jello
to me several times during her shift. I
remember her telling me how fast natural labor can go and that she was scared I
might sneak the baby out on her when she wasn’t looking. The trainee that was working with her scared
us on more than one occasion by not being able to find the baby’s heartbeat
(she was just inexperienced), but each time Terri quickly found it with no
problems.
Sometime around 10:00am both sets of
our parents arrived. My parents and Brandon's mom each came back to visit
us in the labor room one-by-one. Otherwise, they were excitedly hanging
out in the waiting room......
.....waiting......
.............and
waiting...............
............................and
waiting..............................
My labor was going S.L.O.W. Brandon and I found our rhythm in working
through the contractions. We walked the
halls a lot, listened to music some when I needed to relax, and Brandon read
Bible verses to me that I had prepared beforehand. But things were moving at snails pace.
By the end of July 8th, I had worked
through contractions that came anywhere from 2 minutes apart to 13 minutes
apart, but on average were every 5-8 minutes. Some lasted longer than
others (on average 45seconds to 2 minutes in length), but all fairly moderate
to strong. I had only progressed 1cm though and was now at 3cm, after
nearly 24 hours of labor. But, the natural labor techniques I had learned
helped me work through each contraction and gave me confidence to
continue. Brandon was my rock during the contractions. I focused on
his eyes and he counted through each breath for me. It was such a neat
experience to be doing this *with* my husband instead of him being a bystander. We were doing this together. Bringing our son into the world
together. Even now, I get teary eyed
thinking of how unique and bonding this time of labor was for us. We had a lot of time to ourselves which
allowed us to rely on each other (mostly me relying on him, not gonna lie), and
it just deepened everything between us that much more. Isn’t the Lord good, to use something painful
like labor to strengthen your marriage?
I mean, seriously!
As
we moved from day one of labor, I never imagined we wouldn't have a
baby that day. Everyone told me natural labor would make it shorter!
Well, apparently my stubbornness runs deep.
Part 2 of Jedi's birth story will be posted in the next few days!